Sunday, June 13, 2021

Experience failures and learn the success formula

One of the questions professionals, business leaders, entrepreneurs etc always get is, “What is the success formula you used?” It is assumed that most of the successful people have planned their career and they got what they dreamed for. We always share success stories of professional, entrepreneur, leaders but we never share failure stories. We forget that the success stories which you read or listen to are hardly 10% and there are almost 90% failure stories. 

You can learn from success stories but you can learn more from failure stories.   

After the graduations, there were very few employment opportunities. Initial days were tough for me and my generation. I was doing small jobs only to get some money. I was not enjoying those jobs. My bosses were terrific, my employers were not that good. Others were getting good jobs and good salaries. I was thinking, I was a failure, alone all the way. However, I always learnt whatever came to me. I learnt so many things, I learnt dealing with difficult people, I learnt to work hard, I worked till late night. Though the jobs, managers and employers were difficult, my family members, colleagues and friends were good. Till late night we used to spend time and have fun mimicking others. We shared the same bonding, same emotions. We used to share  food and borrow money from each other.

They were the same as me, living in a small house, their struggles were not different, they also needed their jobs to keep going. In fact, they were much senior than me and had a lot of family responsibilities.

I learnt a big lesson from them, and that is keep going…

I was also trying to get a good job with a good salary. I was rejected by a few companies because of various reasons, like bad English, lack of confidence, or just my poor presentation skills.

Failing one time or even several times doesn’t make you a failure any more than losing one game makes you a loser. Failure can be a great teacher, great mentor. Failure makes you stronger. Failure keeps you grounded.

I became stronger day by day. It kept me grounded and humbled. I was among those youths, who perhaps would get frustrated, disappointed, depressed but I was different from them and that is I never took failures personally. I learnt lessons from each failure.

All my failures taught me followings:

Being grounded and realistic: I was expecting too much from me. I wanted to be successful fast without understanding my limitations. If English is the hurdle to get a good job, I learnt English. I spent sleepless nights watching English shows, news channels, reading newspapers and books to develop the English language and vocabulary. Whenever I used to learn any new English word, I used to write it in a notebook. I  used to make sure to use that word during the next conversation. With the permission of my employer, I took another job in English Daily to edit their late night editions. I made mistakes in the language that I learnt daily. This helped me manifold. I learned language skills; I improved my vocabulary; I gained knowledge on multiple subjects.  

Not taking the failure personally: Failures are because of circumstances and some limitations we have. Human being is not perfect. Failures reminds us that we are human being. I used to get disappointed and frustrated because I used to take the failures personally. My emotions were not in control. I always used to blame myself and my background but then I realised that problems is not always with me. People are also unfair and political. Sometimes situations and time is unfair. It is just not the right time. So instead of taking the failure personally, I started to reflect upon the reasons. This made me stronger day by day.

Self-Image: Failures are inevitable but during this process we need to learn but also take care of self. Keeping a positive self-image is very crucial after failures. I learnt not to blame others but also not to blame myself. We should learn from failures and mistakes and be optimistic about the future. This helps me to gain confidence. I started not to think much about the failure events, instead focusing on next.

Never give up: Most people fail before achieving success; the difference is that successful people never stop trying. I always used to tell my mind to keep going. I took inspiration from others, I always used to observe those poor people who were struggling even to maintain their livelihood. That gave me the positive feeling that at least I have something in hand.  

Somebody rightly said, “Age wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles, the soul.”

Mediation, hobbies, and fun: Disappointments and failures never took my heart and mind from me. I used to visit temples regularly and sit there. I remember going to the ‘Lord Mahadeva’ temple which was located outside of the city. I used to sit there and meditate for hours. I read a lot of books, all types of books, books in Hindi, Marathi English. I listened to songs regularly. I spent time with my friends sharing stories and also helping them. I attended a lot of seminars and lectures on different subjects during and even after my college days. I also attended a lot of cultural and social activities. I also started writing columns for newspapers and magazines.  Even during the odd times, I laughed loudly. I never allowed my smile to disappear. I started to mentor young children and college students on personality development. All this has a positive impact on me. 

At present, I have all those things which I dreamed of. I have no fears and insecurities. But I went through the hottest fire in the past which made me stronger, curious and courageous.

Richard Nixon once said, “The finest steel has to go through the hottest fire”. I learnt resilience.

One piece of advice I always have is that “be like a sponge. Absorb good and bad, but learn from those.”    

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's book are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga 

Vitality in Human Resource is now available in paperback edition. Please click here to buy

Buy Industrial Relations Strategy Framework For Every Manager on amazon. Click IR Strategy Framework.

Saturday, June 05, 2021

Restoring the ecosystem - Environment Day

House sparrows are in our sentiments because they were part of our lives and memories. They were in stories, which we listened to during our childhood. During my childhood, we had a good relationship with house sparrows. Different types of birds were nestled on different types of local trees. They were part of our ecosystem. We all were living together. The ecosystem was maintained nicely respecting each other. Every evening, different types of birds were seen in the sky.  I left my village for education and career, and moved to different cities. When I moved to Roha. Our colony was the home for Flamingos and other migratory birds during every monsoon. However, I have never seen the fictions between local and migratory birds. Of course, the quarrels for space were natural and not deadly like us. 

House sparrow (Pic: Atharva Bidwaik)

House sparrows were rarely seen in Pune, however in the last 2 years due to lock-down and reduction in pollution, they along with different types of birds are regularly seen around. This is also an indication that Mother Earth is healing. It is our responsibility to maintain the ecosystem where all living animals live together. We, human beings, need to learn to respect the space required for other living objects. We also need to understand that we can’t survive without their survival. Do you know that honeybees have been dying at an alarming rate over the past decades? They are responsible for much of the food on our plate. Bees perform a task that is vital to the survival of agriculture: pollination. In fact, one third of our global food supply is pollinated by bees.

Kingfisher spotted by Atharva Bidwaik

Lot of species are on the verge of extinction. The impact on the earth is seen because of this. We all know the reasons behind this. We are sabotaging nature by interfering by cutting trees, building big buildings, and overusing the resources. Human beings are always selfish.   

Red Panda (Pic: Atharva Bidwaik)

Today we are celebrating “World Environment Day”. Every year, the world celebrates Environment Day on the 5th Jun. As per United Nations principle, a vehicle for encouraging awareness and action for the protection of the environment, this day is celebrated annually. This year’s theme is “Ecosystem Restoration”. The objective of ecosystem restoration is to contribute to the conservation and sustainable use of biodiversity as well as create social, economic and environmental benefits, whereby healthy and connected ecosystems should contribute to improve food and water security, peoples’ livelihoods and to mitigate and adapt to climate change”.

Mula River (Pic: Vinod Bidwaik)

We need to seriously think and act to protect and restore the ecosystem, otherwise human beings will be extinct. We have a greater responsibility to provide the greater place to live to our next generations.   

As per American proverb, “We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children.” The message that we need to act if we want to pass on a world with a healthy environment to future generations.

Guest at our home (Pic: Atharva Bidwaik)

What can we do?

We can do it by just following the 3R philosophy which everybody knows.

Reduce, Recycle, and Reuse.

Our smaller actions will have a major impact.

Reduce: Just reduce all consumption, like food, water, fuel, travel, electricity etc just by ¼ from today. If you are conformable, you can reduce it by 50%.

Recycle: Use the products which are recyclable. Don’t go for flashy, costly. products.  

Recycle: While buying any products, check if they are recyclable. Make yourself educated about the product life cycle. 

Mula River near Pune (Pic: Atharva Bidwaik)

"The earth has enough resources for our needs, but not for our greed"  Mahatma Gandhi quotes. Let’s reduce that greed also.  

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 
Author's book are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga 
Vitality in Human Resource is now available in paperback edition. Please click here to buyBuy Industrial Relations Strategy Framework For Every Manager on amazon. Click IR Strategy Framework.

Saturday, May 29, 2021

Be wise with a wise mind.

Once a King was discussing life with Yogi.  

The king asked Yogi, “What do you and your disciples do in your monastery?”

The Yogi answered, “We sit, we walk, and we eat.”

The King said, “Then how are you different, from common people, for we do those things as well?”

The Yogi responded, “When we sit, we know we are sitting. When we walk, we know we are walking. When we eat, we know we are eating.”

That's mindfulness. When you are performing any act, you know exactly what you are doing. You perform with all senses. 

We become emotional and respond, or we respond based on what we believe. We are also aware about the concept of left and right brain. Left brain is logical, analytical and methodical; however the right brain is more creative, intuitive, emotional. It also means that we human beings live with mind and heart. The mind and heart will not always be the same. 

The famous movie, ‘Indian’ was released in 1996. Kamal Hasan played the double role of Father and Son. Father is a freedom fighter, very strong on his own ethics and loves India from the heart. When he comes to know about the corrupt practices, he starts killing those corrupt people.  His son is also a corrupt RTO officer. Son approves the permit of an unfit school bus by taking the bribe. After a few days, while going to school, an accident happens, taking the lives of small children.    

When the father comes to know this, he feels very sad knowing his own son is a part of a corrupt system. He decides to punish the son and punishment means death. Manisha Koirala, fiancée of the son, pleads not to kill him ‘would be husband’. Father asks her, “Do you think that he has done right by taking bribes and approving the permit for an unfit bus? Because of him 25 children died. He could have avoided the accident.”   

Manisha Koirala replies, “दिमाग मानता है, लेकिन दिल नहीं (Mind agrees but not my heart.)”

Father replies firmly, “मेरा दिमाग और दिल एक ही है (My mind and heart is the same.). Please don’t stop me”

When you have to make the choice between heart and mind, what will you choose? The difficult dilemma always. Our dominant part takes over and we make decisions accordingly. It is highly impossible to have the mind and heart the same, but balancing is a must. Emotional intelligence helps us to make better choices in life.

As per the Zen philosophy, we have 3 states of mind, Reasonable mind, Emotional mind and Wise mind. This philosophy is also used to treat borderline personality disorder. Therapy is known as Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT). DBT looks at the mind in two-part, Reasonable mind and Emotional mind. You can relate this to the left brain and the right brain. We need balancing. That balancing mind is ‘Wise Mind.’ 

Common people do all things with either Reasonable or Emotional mind, however people who practice mindfulness like Yogi, use ‘Wise mind’. In simple language, your Emotional mind is your feelings, Reasonable mind is your thought based on facts and Wise mind balances both, knows which part of the mind is acting and responses wisely. 

Wise mind is the state of mind in the middle of both logical and emotional mind. In a Wise mind, we are aware of our feelings, and we decide how to act in a way to honour our feelings and goals. In a Wise mind, if we were angered, we would acknowledge our feelings and act in a way that would not create negative consequences for ourselves.  

You don’t need to be Yogi or Buddha to be in the state of Wise mind. It needs practice. Whenever you are in any situation or you have to make choices, decisions, if you are struggling with dilemmas use following tactics.

Just observe the situation, behaviour of another person and its impact and also your behaviour, feelings and thoughts.

Take a pause instead of responding and acknowledge those feelings.

Be in the present situation, experience what you are feeling, without thinking much of the past and future.

Don’t be judgemental by tagging good or bad. Just check observable facts.

And be effective without allowing your emotions to control your behaviour.   

The Wise mind will create some sort of stress, to know what it means and why they are feeling it. But this frame of mind also allows you to see a way through. It accepts reality and works to change what it believes is changeable. 

“Our life is shaped by our mind; we become what we think. Joy follows a pure thought like a shadow that never leaves”: Buddha

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 
Author's book are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga 

Vitality in Human Resource is now available in paperback edition. Please click here to buy

Buy Industrial Relations Strategy Framework For Every Manager on amazon. Click IR Strategy Framework.

Sunday, May 23, 2021

Psychological safety nets

Psychological Safety Nets are important to create the effective culture 

You can smell the organizational culture by entering the office. You sense it through the approach of the security guard, receptionist, the behaviour of office boys and the overall atmosphere you feel. If you keep observing, you may get more clues about the organization. I know that we should not judgmental based on our primary interactions, but unfortunately the culture that you observe is cascaded down by the top management. Sometimes you sense the invisible pressure among employees, sometimes, you sense a vibrant and cheerful atmosphere. In some organizations, laughing, joking is not allowed, however in some organizations work is fun. It is upto the management what culture they want to create. One of the friends shared that in his organization being active on social media is not considered positively. However, in most of the organizations social media is a tool of branding, marketing and increasing the business. Different people will have different perspectives but being logical is the key to success.

"Some Managers believe that employees should be controlled to get the maximum benefits. However, they forget that the presence of fear in an organization is the first sign of weak leadership. After working with different Indian and multinational organizations and working closely with the leadership team, I can co-relate human being’s basic needs.

My observations are

Human beings want to be included. They are productive when they feel that they are the part of the team, group, tribe, and overall ecosystem.

They want to grow: Human beings want to grow in life in two ways, financially and in their career. In this process they want to learn to earn both, salary increase and career development.    

They want to contribute to the organization if you keep them motivated towards their purpose. If their purpose is aligned, they will go the extra mile.

And finally, they want change when they believe things need to change. They will come up with suggestions, solutions on how we can change. They will be the part of change. 

Now to do this we need to create the ecosystem in the organization where employees feel safe while doing any legitimate activities in the organization. They expect psychological safety. It is organizational responsibility to create such safety nets within the organization.  

"When psychological safety is secured, people take more accountability and ownership. They use their discretionary effort, resulting in learning and problem solving. When there is a fear people use their energy thinking risks and hardly opening their mouth. They choose to be selective and only speak that managers and top management like to listen to.

How do you create such an ecosystem?  

Inclusion: Organizations who were serving strictly veg food because of owners’ values, started serving non-veg food when they expanded in different geographies and continents. It was necessary to be inclusive and by doing this they exercised the inclusion where employees felt that their needs were taken care of.            

Allow to fail: When organizations stimulate learning by any means and reward the learning, employees try to take risk by doing different things. Learning means not necessary just having training programmes. It also means doing things differently, working on change, and taking risks. During this process, there are possibilities of failures, and when people fail, leaders need to reward the failure. Failure stories and learning from those should be encouraged.

Empowerment: Getting people on board and empowering them is necessary to get the contribution from them. Empowerment and freedom of doing the job makes the environment more productive.

LinkedIn conducted a study to identify the most important soft skills. One of the top skills is creativity. But creativity doesn’t come when people are under pressure and have the fear to express. When people feel free and are empowered to apply their creativity, they make wonders. If they are not allowed to challenge, they will never speak; they will not be creative. During this process healthy conflicts need to be allowed. When there’s censure or punishment, when intellectual conflict turns into interpersonal conflict, when fear becomes a motivator, the process collapses, and people go silent.

Safety nets are necessary in any ecosystem to create the psychological safety in the organizations. If you want results, give freedom and make the environment safe.  

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's book are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga 

Vitality in Human Resource is now available in paperback edition. Please click here to buy

Buy Industrial Relations Strategy Framework For Every Manager on amazon. Click IR Strategy Framework.

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