Monday, January 30, 2023

Leadership Myths vs. Reality: Separating Fact from Fiction

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Leadership is a complex and multifaceted concept, and over the years, many myths and misconceptions have arisen around what it means to be a successful leader. In this blog, we'll take a closer look at some of the most common leadership myths and explore the reality behind them.

Myth #1: Leaders are born, not made

Reality: While some people may have a natural inclination towards leadership, it's a skill that can be learned and developed over time. Effective leaders possess a combination of innate abilities and learned skills, and anyone can become a successful leader with the right training, experience, and support.

Myth #2: Leaders must always be decisive

Reality: While it's important for leaders to make decisions quickly and confidently, it's also crucial to consider the facts and gather input from others before making a decision. Being too hasty or overconfident can lead to mistakes and decreased trust from followers. Effective leaders are decisive but also able to listen, gather information, and make informed decisions.

Myth #3: Leaders must always be in control

Reality: The best leaders understand that they don't have all the answers, and they're not afraid to ask for help or delegate tasks to others. Being too controlling can stifle creativity and innovation, and can also lead to burnout and decreased job satisfaction. Effective leaders are confident enough to delegate, and they empower their followers to make decisions and contribute to the success of the team.

Myth #4: Leaders must be strong and unemotional

Reality: While it's important for leaders to project confidence and stability, it's also important to show empathy and emotional intelligence. Leaders who are too rigid or unapproachable can alienate their followers, and can also miss important cues and opportunities for growth and development. Effective leaders are strong, but also approachable, empathetic, and able to connect with their followers on a personal level.

Leadership is a complex and multifaceted concept that is influenced by a combination of natural abilities and learned skills. By separating fact from fiction, and understanding the reality behind common leadership myths, we can develop more effective and successful leaders who drive positive change and business success.

Please respond the survey, I am conducting, as a part of my research by clicking on >> Leadership Competencies required for managers while handling crisis situations

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's books are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga. You can buy the print copy of Vitality in Human Resources on amazon. Click >> Vitality in Human Resource: Adding human dimensions in HR processes    

Royalty from books is used for social cause. 

Sunday, January 22, 2023

Truth and lies

Few people are qualified in lies and bending the truth according to their convenience. Truths are converted into lies and lies into the truth. They create an impression in the organization and society that they have relevant information with them but nobody knows that the said information is not truth. For them perceptions, data, deceiving knowledge are truth. They will ensure the damage to the people around, society and the organization for their personal agenda. Some people called those characters, corporate leaders. 

Truth and ethical lying are complex and often contentious topics. At its core, truth is the state of being in agreement with fact or reality, while a lie is a false statement made with the intent to deceive. However, the concept of what constitutes a "fact" or "reality" can vary depending on one's perspective, and the morality of lying can depend on the context in which it occurs.

In some cases, lying may be seen as an ethical action. For example, lying to protect someone from harm or to prevent a greater harm from occurring may be considered morally justifiable. Similarly, lying to spare someone's feelings or to maintain a sense of privacy may also be seen as acceptable. On the other hand, lying in order to gain an unfair advantage or to manipulate others is generally considered unethical. Such lies can cause harm to others and undermine trust and relationships.

It is important to note that the concept of "white lies" or "small lies" can also be a gray area when it comes to the ethics of lying. While these types of lies may not cause significant harm, they can still contribute to a culture of dishonesty and lack of trust.

In any case, it is important to weigh the potential consequences of one's actions before deciding whether or not to tell a lie. The truth may be uncomfortable or difficult to hear, but it is ultimately the foundation of trust and understanding in any relationship or situation.

There are different types of Truths. 

"Paribhashik satya" is a phrase that can be translated to "conventional truth" or "conventional reality" in English. It refers to the commonly accepted facts or beliefs that are considered to be true within a particular culture or society. These truths are often taken for granted and are not subject to question or doubt.

For example, It is generally accepted as true that the earth is oval and that gravity is a force that pulls objects towards the center of the earth. These are considered Paribhashik satya, as they are widely accepted as true within that culture and are not typically questioned. It is important to note that Paribhashik satya can vary from culture to culture and can change over time. For example, there is one section who still believes that earth is flat. What is considered true in one society may not be considered true in another, and what was once considered true may be proven to be false later on.

Vyavharic satya, also known as Practical truth, is the idea that truth can be relative and flexible depending on the situation. It's the understanding that in certain situations, it may be more beneficial to bend the truth or withhold certain information. This concept is often used in business, politics, and personal relationships.

In business, vyavharic satya can be used to negotiate deals, protect trade secrets, or avoid damaging relationships with clients or partners. For example, a company may choose to downplay the negative effects of a product recall to avoid losing customers or damaging their reputation. In politics, vyavharic satya can be used to gain support for a cause, avoid controversy, or avoid damaging relationships with other countries. For example, a politician may choose to downplay their opposition to a certain policy in order to gain support from a particular group of voters.

In personal relationships, vyavharic satya can be used to avoid conflict, protect someone's feelings, or maintain a sense of harmony. For example, a friend may choose not to tell another friend that they're not invited to a party to avoid hurt feelings. While vyavharic satya can be used as a tool to navigate difficult situations, it's important to use it responsibly. It's not appropriate to use it to deceive, manipulate, or harm others. It's also important to be aware of the potential consequences of bending the truth. If a lie is uncovered, it can lead to mistrust and damage relationships.

Prasadic satya, also known as contextual truth, is the idea that truth can change based on the context or situation. It's the understanding that what is true in one situation may not be true in another. This concept is often used in philosophy, religion, and psychology.

In philosophy, prasadic satya is used to argue that truth is not absolute, but rather a matter of perspective. For example, a philosopher might argue that what is true for one person may not be true for another. This idea is often associated with relativism, the belief that there is no universal truth.

In religion, prasadic satya is used to argue that the truth of a religious text or belief may change depending on the context. For example, a religious leader might argue that the meaning of a scripture changes depending on the time and place it's being interpreted. This idea is often associated with the concept of progressive revelation, the belief that God's truth is revealed gradually over time.

In psychology, prasadic satya is used to argue that the truth of an individual's experience may change depending on the context. For example, a therapist might argue that what is true for one person in one moment may not be true for them in another moment. This idea is often associated with the concept of cognitive dissonance, the psychological state of discomfort when holding two or more conflicting beliefs.

Lies are always unethical and detrimental to self and others, however the individual may choose truth which is moreover lie sometimes. Sometimes, we have to lie to tell the truth. In the civilized world, everything is a lie. When somebody doesn’t want to disturb or hurt anybody, the lie is spoken. For example, if the doctor tells the patient that s/he will be recovered very soon, knowing that the patient is on a dead bed, it is an ethical lie. But if you are damaging somebody, it is definitely not good.  

The question still remains what is truth. The truth which takes you to the Supreme Power, God, is a truth. That all which leads to the truth, is a truth.

Please respond the survey, I am conducting, as a part of my research by clicking on >> Leadership Competencies required for managers while handling crisis situations

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's books are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga. You can buy the print copy of Vitality in Human Resources on amazon. Click >> Vitality in Human Resource: Adding human dimensions in HR processes    

Royalty from books is used for social cause. 

Sunday, January 15, 2023

How people manipulate...


Once upon a time, in a far-off kingdom, there lived a clever and cunning fox named Karaka. Karaka was always looking for ways to trick and manipulate others for his own gain. One day, he came up with a plan to trick the king of the kingdom, who was known for his love of hunting.

Karaka went to the king and told him that there was a magical deer that lived in the forest, which was said to be the most elusive and difficult to catch. The king, intrigued by the idea, immediately set out to hunt for the deer.

Karaka, knowing the king would never be able to find the deer, led him on a wild goose chase through the forest. The king, who was not familiar with the forest, was easily led astray by Karaka's clever tricks and manipulations.

For days, the king searched for the deer, but to no avail. Finally, he grew tired and frustrated and decided to give up the hunt. Karaka, seeing his opportunity, suggested that the king could always go hunting with him, as he knew the forest well and would be able to guide him to the deer.

The king, tired and defeated, agreed to this arrangement. And so, Karaka was able to manipulate the king into becoming his hunting companion, and he used this opportunity to gain the king's trust and favor.

In the end, the king learned that the deer did not exist, and that Karaka had only been using him for his own gain. The king was disappointed but grateful for the lesson he learned about the dangers of manipulation. He banished Karaka from the kingdom, and from that day forward, he was more cautious and skeptical of those who claimed to have special knowledge or abilities.

Moral of the Story: Be wary of those who try to manipulate you for their own gain. Trust your instincts and be vigilant in identifying and avoiding those who would use you for their own benefit.

We may have different experiences while working or interacting with different people. Sometimes irrespective of your positive or good behavior, people will try to manipulate you for their personal agenda. Manipulation is common, but if it hurts next person, then it is dangerous.  

Manipulative tactics are behaviors that are designed to control or influence someone in a subtle or deceptive way. These tactics can be difficult to recognize, as they are often disguised as helpful or caring actions. However, they can have a negative impact on both the person being manipulated and the manipulator.

They manipulate because,
  • They have personal agenda to gain something from you,
  • They have a fear that you are hindrance in their growth,
  • They are insecure about you,
  • They feel that you are a threat to them,
  • They are envy with your success, approach and experience,
  •  They just hate you because of your cultural and personal background. 
They will use different tactics to manipulate you. Some are as under: 

Gaslighting: This involves manipulating someone into doubting their own perceptions and memories. The manipulator may deny or downplay events that have taken place, or may try to make the victim feel like they are going crazy. Sometimes, they will just create a situation on a smaller issue where someone questions their own sanity or memory. This is often done in order to gain and maintain power and control over the next person.

Trying to praise the person: Manipulators may use excessive flattery or praise to try to win someone over and to get what they want. This tactic is often used to make the victim feel special or important, and to create a sense of obligation. This involves overwhelming someone with affection in order to gain control over them. Asking support and help primarily is the first step. But they are selfish here. Will get the job done and then keep you aside. 

Guilt-tripping: Manipulators may try to make the victim feel guilty or responsible for their own feelings or actions. They may try to play on the victim's emotions or to make them feel like they owe something to the manipulator. 

The person implies your smaller mistakes, making the fuss around that and creating the situation where the next person may feel that he/she has made a big mistake. 

Passive-aggressiveness: This involves indirectly expressing negative feelings through indirect or nonverbal communication.

Emotional blackmail: Using someone's emotions or vulnerability to control or manipulate them. This involves using emotional manipulation to get what the manipulator wants.

Sidelining or Isolating: They cut you off from their support system. Most of the time, you are kept aside or they will sideline you. They will start directly interacting with your team ignoring you during meetings irrespective of the capabilities of the other person.    

Triangulation: Here they will involve a third person in a situation. Will create a negative impression among others about you. 

Coercion and threats: This involves using threats or force to make someone do something.
Manipulative people can be difficult to deal with, as they often use tactics like guilt, shame, and emotional manipulation to get what they want.
 
Reverse psychology: They will convince you to do something by telling them not to do it.

Fear tactics: Creating the atmosphere of fear by using fear of fake incidents and or using misinformation. 

Mind games: using complex and manipulative tactics to control or manipulate someone's thoughts and emotions. Gossiping and encouraging gossiping and not speaking good about you. They will try to connect the information from others which they will use against you. 

If manipulation tactics are not successful, they will try to eliminate the next person in different ways. They will create a situation, where the next person will feel that s/he is not respected and will leave the organization. 

How to handle such people?

It can be easy to feel confused and overwhelmed in these situations, but there are steps you can take to protect yourself and to assert your own boundaries. I learnt these while dealing with those idiots. 

First and foremost, it's important to recognize when someone is trying to manipulate you. Look out for red flags like flattery, guilt-tripping, or attempts to make you feel responsible for their emotions.

Once you've identified that someone is trying to manipulate you, it's important to set boundaries and to communicate them clearly. Let the person know what is and is not acceptable behavior, and be firm and assertive in your communication.

It can also be helpful to seek out the support of friends, family, or colleagues in these situations. Surrounding yourself with people who support and encourage you can provide you with the strength and confidence you need to stand up to manipulative individuals. If you are working in the organization, use the whistleblower mechanism against the person. 

Finally, remember that it's okay to say no. It's important to prioritize your own well-being and to put your own needs first. Don't feel guilty or ashamed for standing up for yourself and for setting boundaries.

Don't feel guilty: Manipulative people may try to make you feel guilty or ashamed for standing up for yourself or for setting boundaries. It's important to remember that it's okay to say no and to prioritize your own well-being.

Communicate clearly: Make sure to clearly communicate your boundaries and expectations with the person. Be firm and assertive in your communication, and don't let them bully or intimidate you.

Document everything: If your boss is engaging in manipulative behavior, it's important to document it. Keep track of any instances of manipulation, and make sure to keep copies of any relevant emails or other communication.

Please respond the survey, I am conducting, as a part of my research by clicking on >> Leadership Competencies required for managers while handling crisis situations

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's books are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga. You can buy the print copy of Vitality in Human Resources on amazon. Click >> Vitality in Human Resource: Adding human dimensions in HR processes    

Royalty from books is used for social cause. 

Saturday, January 07, 2023

Forgiveness- Forgive thy idiots

It's natural to feel hurt and angry when others cause us pain or harm. It's a normal and healthy response to protect ourselves and defend our boundaries. However, holding onto that hurt and anger can be toxic and damaging to ourselves and our relationships.

When we refuse to forgive others for causing us hurt, we allow that hurt to fester and grow, causing ongoing emotional pain and suffering. It can also lead to resentment and bitterness, which can poison our relationships and prevent us from moving forward.

On the other hand, when we choose to forgive others, we allow ourselves to let go of the hurt and move on. It doesn't mean that we forget what happened or that we accept harmful behavior, but it means that we choose not to allow the hurt to control us and our relationships.

Forgiveness is a powerful tool that allows us to let go of anger, resentment, and hurt feelings towards someone who has wronged us. It is a way of releasing ourselves from the pain and suffering caused by the actions of others, and allows us to move forward with our lives in a positive and healthy manner. 

"Forgiveness is like a weight lifted off your shoulders. When you hold onto grudges and resentment, it can feel like you are carrying a heavy burden that drains your energy and joy. But when you choose to forgive, it's like a burden has been lifted and you are free to move forward with a sense of peace and lightness."

Forgiveness is also like a fresh start. It's like a new page in a book, an opportunity to leave the past behind and begin anew. When you extend forgiveness to others, you open the door to healing and reconciliation, and the possibility of a brighter future. So the next time you are faced with the opportunity to forgive, remember that it's like a weight lifted off your shoulders and a fresh start. Choose to let go of your anger and embrace the power of forgiveness.

Forgiveness does not mean that we have to forget what happened, or that we have to let the person who hurt us off the hook for their actions. It does not mean that we have to continue to have a relationship with them, if that is not healthy for us. But it does mean that we let go of the negative feelings towards them, and that we choose to respond to the situation in a positive and healthy way. 

One way to begin the process of forgiveness is to practice self-compassion. This means treating ourselves with the same kindness, care, and understanding that we would offer to a good friend. It means acknowledging our own pain and suffering, and giving ourselves permission to feel our emotions. It also means reminding ourselves that we are not alone, and that many others have gone through similar experiences.

Another way to practice forgiveness is to use visualization techniques. This can involve imagining ourselves in a peaceful and calming setting, such as a beautiful garden or a serene beach. We can then visualize the person who hurt us, and imagine them in a positive light. For example, we can imagine them apologizing for their actions, or expressing regret. This can help us to release some of the negative emotions that we are feeling.

Ultimately, forgiveness is a choice that we make for ourselves. It is a way of taking control of our own lives, and of moving forward in a positive and healthy manner. It is a way of letting go of the pain and suffering caused by the actions of others, and of finding peace and healing within ourselves.

Please respond the survey, I am conducting, as a part of my research by clicking on >> Leadership Competencies required for managers while handling crisis situations

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's books are available on AmazonFlipkartPothi and BookGanga. You can buy the print copy of Vitality in Human Resources on amazon. Click >> Vitality in Human Resource: Adding human dimensions in HR processes    

Royalty from books is used for social cause. 

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