Love yourself

Self Compassion

We all have some expectations from ourselves, however when those expectations are not fulfilled, we become angry and disappointed. Sometimes we curse ourselves. If this happens repeatedly, we start self-doubting. We are all taught to respect others, listen to others, understand others and so on…human being is a social animal; and hence most of the times, its need is recognition. Recognition of any form works for him. Recognition of being a respected person in the society, recognition of good human being. If the person behaves badly, still it wants the recognition for being bad. Human beings expect a good tag for him, and the person will do anything to get it. Good people try to get the recognition of being good and bad people get it by being bad. Good people try to get acceptance from society. 

The whole award industry is using those professionals where every 1 professional out of 10 is getting some achiever, top professional, top leader award. Why this? Because to be likable and respectable. But when they try to be more likable and compromise with their values then conflict occurs. To get an award, to make others happy, to make a boss happy, to make peers happy, we go beyond boundaries which they don't care.  In this process, we do injustice to ourselves. 

Bad people try to create the impression by being worse and dangerous. That’s why the gangsters, scamsters, mafias proudly publicize their work. Once I was interacting one of the union leaders and he was proudly telling me how many half murders he has done and how many court cases are against him.  

Image- internet

Forget those bad people, but let’s speak about those people who want to always be likable. They care a lot for other people, but not themselves. The pressure of performance, the pressure of earning meals for the family, relationship conflicts and workplace stress create an unnecessary burden on human beings. The pandemic has put everyone in a very odd situation like this. However, it is also the time to take care of yourself. During the air travel the safety instructions are given before the take off. While doing this crew members emphasize on putting the oxygen mask first and then to the child and others. This means that you should survive first and be able to help others. Unless you don’t care about yourself, nobody will help you. If you love your family and friends, first be able to help them by caring for yourself. And to do that you have to be compassionate towards yourself. Self-compassion is crucial for your survival in a real sense. Self-compassion is more powerful than your self-esteem. People who are compassionate toward their struggles, feelings, failings and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who repeatedly criticize themselves. Self-compassion increases the feeling of security and net worth. This is more powerful when you get a setback, and your self-esteem is low. 

Whenever there is negative thought, self-compassion helps to think deeply and come out from the setbacks. When we love ourselves, we are kind with self, it brings positivity. This positivity is important to be resilient. When you accept yourself as it is then only you can think to change. In that case, being vulnerable, taking critical feedback and recognizing development areas becomes easy.  

Accept yourself as it is and be compassionate with yourself. 

(Opinions are purely personal & does not represent my organizations, current or past) 

Author's book are available on Amazon, Flipkart, Pothi and BookGanga. You can buy the print copy of Vitality in Human Resources on amazon. Click >> Vitality in Human Resource: Adding human dimensions in HR processes    

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