What are your Values?

Values: They Make Sense…

 When I was child, one day, I found the coin of 50 paise on the street while coming home from the school. 50 paise was also reasonably good amount for me. I could buy 10 candies with 50 paise that time. When I reached at home, I showed  the coin to my mother happily…I thought my mother would allow me to take candies with that coin. But when she saw it, she started asking questions after questions. She ensured that I really found it on the street. Then she said..

“Have you tried to find the owner of this coin?” I said, “No, nobody was there that time…"

“Son, this is not our coin, somebody must have lost it and we don’t have the claim on this. Please go in the temple and put it in the donation box.” She ordered firmly.   

Above incident taught me a lot. The integrity and no claim on other’s money are the fundamental values, I learned and I still follow the same today…

Fundamentally values mean our belief on something, the way we work and the fundamental dos and don’ts while living our life. Values are beliefs about what is more important to any individual in life. These values are based on the purpose of our life.  Values represent basic convictions that a “specific mode of conduct or end-state of existence is personally or socially preferable to an opposite or converse mode of conduct or end-state of existence.”

Milton Rokeach created the Rokeach Value Survey (RVS) which consists of two sets of values:

Terminal values: These  values are desirable & end-states of existence. For example a world of peace, a sense of accomplishment, a world of beauty, equality, freedom, and salvation.

Instrumental values: These are preferable modes of behaviour or means of achieving the terminal values. For example, capable, cheerful, courageous, imaginative, logical, loving, and responsible.

However basically all values are for the purpose of life…may it be fulfilling our need, performing our obligations, achieving our aim or goals, discharging the duties as citizen- corporate or social, or satisfying our conscience etc..

Our values are developed from family background, our childhood perceptions,  surrounding, our teachers, reading, education, friends, inspiration from our role models… sometimes it keeps changing as per the situation, however there are some values which came from our parents and elders on which we would not like to compromise.

We should keep in mind that our value system govern our thinking, influence our attitude, motivate our actions. They decide the right or wrong of a choice and they determine our image as a person who is right or wrong, trustworthy or untrustworthy.

If your personal values are aligned with organizational
values, then only you would get sense of achievement.

What’s about the individual values and organizational values?

There are lot of changes in the way we operate.  Every company is focusing on “new way of working.” The value systems, also, have undergone a gradual shift over the past few years. This shift is driven by an increased focus on customers and on the individual contribution that employees can make to the business. This shift in values creates an interesting dilemma and potentially serious issues for managers wanting to introduce top-down changes or large change initiatives today. Now everyone in the organization is on Facebook, twitter and companies are recruiting social site experts to gain the competitive advantage. The value system is also changing the basic assumptions. For example, in past people were not open to speak about their pleasure & personal issues unlike today. Now everybody wants to drum his life open on the social media without thinking the consequences of the same.   

Does this means values are also changing? Earlier companies were managing the business and changes thereon under a strict chain of command. Managers had tight control over employees and they would expect compliance with any change. Elders and parents were playing the role of command at home… 

In the organizational context, the individual have different types of vales. These values are

Interpersonal: Values that refer to relations with others.

Extrinsic: Values that refer to motivating factors at work.

Intrinsic: Values that relate to personal beliefs and attitudes.

When somebody does the job in the organization, his values also reflect in his behaviour. However if values of the person contradict with organizational values, then dissatisfaction is common phenomenon. It also has the impact of the culture of organization. For example, if family first is employee’s value and his job in the organization has a tough issue for getting the time for family, there is a contradiction. After few days, employee either have to compromise on his value or he would have to find another job.

In life, you finally have to decide which value you would like to compromise over other. But keep in mind few values can’t be compromised… what are yours’ that you would not compromise?     

If you are an employee, check if your values are aligned with the organizational values. If you are a manager, check how you assess your employee for values and coach our employee so that he gets engaged.  

Why don’t people think logically?

In September 1995, whole India was mass mesmerized  and was offering the milk to Lord Ganesha.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hindu_milk_miracle

Then in 2006, Hundreds of people flocked to Mahim beach after reports of sea water turning sweet spread all over the city. http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/mumbai/People-taste-sweet-sea-water-in-Mumbai/articleshow/1907898.cms

Again in somewhere in 2012, Jesus wept and people made the crowd to get the tears in bottle. http://www.firstpost.com/living/why-jesus-wept-in-mumbai-the-church-versus-the-rationalist-538657.html

And there are many more news.  

There are people who invest  their hard earned money in the Ponzi schemes expecting huge ROI, which is always impossible. There believe on stories and go behind people who are much more smarter than them. Same thing is in multi-level marketing and try to become rich immediately.  They don’t think logically, why anybody will buy their product (say magnet mattress of Rs. 1 lacs)? Why somebody will buy products which are almost 10 time costlier than other products.

If you go in detail, you will come to know that only promoters have become wealthy on the money of investors.     

Then, there are incidences, where people believe on fishing mails like lottery, job and fake password change notification from banks and end up losing their money.

People who are victims are not illiterate, most of the times, they are educated including doctors, engineers, lawyers, teachers etc. What make them to believe on such mad and weird things.  

The question is why they don’t think logically? Why don’t they ask questions on the authenticity? Such frauds and scams are nonsense and people believe this nonsense.  In essence, people believe nonsense because it serves a psychological purpose. Everybody wants to be rich very fast, want to be successful.  In this process, they don’t even think on what is right or wrong for them.

It is always better to show a simple common sense and think logically on such matters.

What do you think? 

Words which you should avoid…transform your communication..

“He directly targeting me while speaking. I agree that I may be wrong, but this is not the way to deal with people. After all we are not children.” One of the employee was complaining about his Manager.

“What he spoke?” I asked him..

“He uses the words always, you did it. You disappointed me.. you make my job difficult etc. etc.”

I realized that people may aware on the uses of words but they may not be aware how to use the word. Much of our communication is done in words. We use words to communicate ourselves to ourselves, as well as to others. Meaning may be the same but it is how you put it. We are dealing with the adults and respect should be the core value. People make mistakes, but when you directly blame them, they feel hurt.  

Worlds should be used very carefully. More important things in how you use your word. Empowering communication can create a shift in your belief system when practiced over a period of time. To make the communication more influencing, you need to carefully use the pattern of the language.

You can use following strategy to make your communication more positive and effective..

Talk in “I” statements.

When you find something wrong with the people, use “I” statement.  It empowers you to express yourself instead of blaming others. For example if you find somebody very arrogant, use “I find you arrogant ” instead of using “You are arrogant.”

Communicate ‘”what is”’ instead of ‘”what is not”. ’

If you are unhappy with something, instead of “I feel unhappy”” say, “I feel sad.”

Drop the word “”can’t”” and change it to “”won’t”.

There is never a can’t.  You have the choice to do something. You can do but it is your choice not to do it. You always have a choice. If you say,  “I can’t come tonight for the party  because I have to take care of my son.” this is just not true.
Reality is “You won’t come tonight, because you choose to baby-sit.”

Drop the word  “problem/issue”  from your vocabulary.

I have seen the people who are always in the problem. In small things they will see issues and problems.  “Boss I have one issue.” If somebody comes and asks me. I say, ”very  good, now solve it.”

Every problem or issues is the opportunity of something., hence use challenge or opportunity instead.

A problem means that you are a victim of the situation. A challenge or an opportunity means that you choose to face the situation and grow beyond it.

Drop the word “but”.

Most of the people, use the word but…

I can do it …but I can’t….

Stop compromising your positive statements with a but”: I had a wonderful day, but...”

Here you enjoyed the day, and spoiling it by just adding but…you also putting the negative shade to the communication…

Did you notice, what statement I used… I used “And” instead of “But” in above statement…

Six Thinking Hats

The main difficulty in thinking is confusion. --Edward de Bono

Are we thinking clearly and effectively on how to handle opportunities as well as conflicts? Do we know what form of thinking is the most appropriate in each situation? How can we improve the way we think as a team? There are different ways of thinking that can help us analyse situations and reach decisions in the most productive way and with the least conflict.

We seem to be jugglers in life, striving to handle the information coming to us at an incredible speed. Our emotions are set off by thousands of stimuli. We try to reason logically about what is happening or could happen to us; we have hopeful visions, pessimistic projections and creative ideas. Also, as we face critical situations at work, we may be thinking about our children, our homes and our families. It's often difficult to focus.

The Six Thinking Hats

Developed by Dr. Edward de Bono, the Six Thinking Hats® is a simple and effective parallel thinking process that helps people become more productive, focused, and mindfully involved. You learn to separate thinking into six distinct modes, which are identified with their own metaphorical "hat." By mentally wearing and switching "hats," you change your mode of thinking.

The Six Thinking Hats will help you increase the constructive output from meetings and decrease meeting duration; explore each situation or problem and generate alternatives that go beyond obvious solutions; and use "parallel thinking" techniques to avoid adversarial thinking and encourage ideas.

To Ensure the Method Works

For the method to work, intentions must lead to performance. In one of my workshop for my employees, I share with my learning partners the phrase “intention without action does not create transformation.”
No matter how great our intentions are, if we don’t move in the right direction, our best aspirations to improve our ways of thinking are useless. De Bono asserts that intention is the first step, but we need structures to carry that intention into action and transform it into results. We need structures for our thinking process to be become as productive as possible. That’s where the six "hats" come in:

White Hat – Information: it is neutral and objective. It deals with objective facts and figures. “Do not interpret. Consider only the facts, please.” It's "pure intellect."

Red Hat – Intuition, emotions, feelings: it suggests rage, fury, passion. It provides the emotional point of view, what the person wearing this hat feels about what is being analysed. “I don’t like what I'm seeing.” “Why?” “It doesn't matter, I just don’t like it.” It's the "beating heart."

Black Hat – Criticism, carefulness, pessimism: it is sad and negative. It covers the negative aspects of why something cannot be done. “This doesn't fit. This won’t work because…” It's the "devil’s advocate."

Yellow Hat – Benefits, values, profits: it is happy and positive. It optimistically covers hope, stimulating positive thought, finding the advantages of the suggested idea or situation being analysed. “I like this because…” It's the "bright sun."

Green Hat – Creativity, alternatives, and possibilities: it is vegetation and fertile growth. In our Indian culture, it is hope and abundance. It suggests the creativity and new ideas about the situation being analysed. “What if we…” “Hey, let’s do this!” It's the "fertile tree."

Blue Hat – Control of the process: it's cold and, like the sky, it's over and above everything. It deals with control and organization of the thought process, as well as the use of the other hats. “Hey, let’s take it step by step. Let’s not get confused.” It's the "orchestra conductor."

The Six-Thinking-Hats method can help you develop your personal thinking processes. However, it is particularly useful to ensure your team becomes more productive when analysing and deciding strategies and possibilities.

Use these ideas to ensure your thinking and the thinking of your team become increasingly clear, creative and productive.

(For more details please contact Edward de Bono's authorised certified trainer)